Good morning kinky peeps! I am back and will be back around a lot more again. You may not believe this, but my apartment has been consumed by a demonic presence for the past few months and it has really been restricting my creativity. hahaha. I am actually not joking. As a matter of fact, here is a nice picture of this thing. Yes, those are my sexy little legs. It is hard to focus or get anything done when you are being haunted by a dark presence coming from the depths of hell. I blame my ex wife. Why not?
This is going to be a quickie article this morning. I have to go set up my new wood lathe and take some bushes down at my other house *Bex7 and jeebz* house. My kinky partners house, I claim em both. I am very excited about the lathe. I will be able to make even better handles and even better toys with this tool. My neighbors are REALLY sick of my shit. They do not like hearing power tools radiating from the one-bedroom apartment that resides above them. That would be me. So, my dominant said I can keep all power tools there.
I am going to talk about thuddy toys this morning. The thud is a very very important implement. I used to love the sting and want only that, until I got into heavier impact play. When you get into heavier impact you need a variety of toys. The reason for that is because a person can only handle so much sting before the pain becomes un pleasurable. We want the pain to bring us pleasure, right? Having a consistent sting is great for more sexual play, but if you are trying to go further and into sub space, I highly suggest having a nice thuddy toy to add the variety.
I am speaking from experience. We didn’t have any thuddy toys a few weeks ago, they were all being worked on and up graded. I can take a hell of a beating but let me tell you it was WAY more difficult for me to relax and take it because the consistent sting became a little too much. It was great as always. If it wasn’t I would have ended it. Well, my partner would have known to stop as well. However, point being I deeply missed the thuddy buddies.
When I top, I start my scene with a nice warm up, using a crop or one of my tiny stingy toys. I create a nice consistent pink base on the skin. Then I turn up the heat a little with another stingy and maybe a second different stingy toy, depending on the bottom. My regular bottom *Alluring2* (fetlife) can handle more and more each time, so I push her a little further. If I don’t know the bottom very well, I stick with one or two stingy toys in the beginning.
When you have someone you scene with on a regular basis, it is nice to have a common goal. I enjoy topping Alluring2 because, first off, she is beautiful inside and out, and because we can go further each time. She wants me to take her to that “place”. It isn’t that much fun for me when I have a bottom that doesn’t want to go further or try new things. Granted they don’t have to, but I also don’t have to top them. I tell all new tops, make sure you are also getting something out of the scene. You are not a kink dispenser. Make sure it is compatible. Sometimes you can only find out through trial and error. I typically know after the first scene if the bottom is one I will want to continue topping.
Depending on how the bottom’s body is responding after the first two rounds with the sting determines my next move. If they are taking it well, I move on to a thuddy toy. If not, I give them a break with a flogger or some sort of sensation play. There are all types of thuddy toys. There are thuddy paddles, butt bruisers and even thuddy wire whips. Believe it or not, yes. I make a thuddy wire toy called “the chaos”. Bex named it that. It really is chaos. It isn’t as scary as it looks. It really has become one of my favorite toys to take and give. The marks it leaves are interesting. I think I am the only person around that makes the chaos. But you can get butt bruisers and thuddy paddles anywhere online, adult store or some dungeons. OR, you can buy one from me 🙂 hehehe. Point being, there are plenty of places you can buy thuddy toys if you know where to look.
Switching toy types confuses the muscles. You want to confuse the muscles when you are topping. When a person is tensed up expecting the same thing, it’s harder to keep them relaxed, take them further and deeper into subspace and harder for them to mark up, IF that is what you are trying to do. Always make sure you have the bottoms consent. Some bottoms want impact but do not want marks. I will NOT top bottoms that have those needs. Also remember, you do not have to top anyone. If their needs do not align with yours, it’s ok to say, ” I don’t think this will be a good fit.” I know I already said that, but it is very important tops take heed to this. If not, I found I end up feeling not great after the scene. I need to be comfortable to do what I do.
After I come with the thud, then I typically give my “break” which is the flogging and the sensory play. Then I take them further with a bigger or more intense thud. When a person is already really red and starting to mark, I typically drop the stingy toys and use only the heavier thuddy ones and the cord floggers and whips. You don’t have to and not everyone does. That is just how I do it. I figure once they are really warmed up and into subspace, this is the time I need to introduce the heavier toys, if they are ok with them. The picture below is my personal favorite butt bruiser.
Isn’t that a cute little thuddy buddy? It has a sting on the flat side and a NICE thud on the round side.
Tomorrow I am going to talk about “going through the bag”. Not everyone is going to be ok or want you to use every toy in your arsenal. Tomorrow I’ll talk about going over all that and a little bit about pre scene negotiation.
Check out my etsy site for cool custom toys of all kinds. Kinkythingsbymandy – Etsy Promocode WORDPRESS 30 percent off.
or my fetlife. mandycole55…PM me for specials and custom orders. My shops are all being re vamped and there are about to be a lot of new customized one-of-a-kind toys. I am even adding a store to all things kink. I am very excited about it. It will be like a coming out party. Oh wait, I thought I did that when I was a teenager? lol.
May light and love surround you and yours.
Message me with the name you would like wood burned in, or leave it plain as well as choice of wood. It’s up to you. I have zebra wood, maple, ash or padauk. The wood in the picture is padauk. Free Shipping as always. Lifetime warranty as well.